name drops are like gum drops
DateCreated	10/27/2005 11:13:00 AM
PostedDate	10/27/2005 10:17:00 AM
Body	they're not very good and they stick to your teeth. the following information is all true and correct, swear by the seat of my pants everyone has their own definition of fame, but these are my celeb moments/hours/weeks/years of interest - i will likely add an additional blog to this as i can't quite recall every one of them *james st james calls out "shitting glitter" to us when he sees us on the streets *my favorite james in the world queried "what's outside of pleasantville?" in said film *the best sean i know starred in NYPD blue show entitled "don't meth with me" as the meth loving fag - he looked hot heroin chic *my best witch i know, ginny- starred in "satan's school for girls" and plays boo in longest running dog musical ever, bark *the hottest mandy (i cannot get enough of this chick's backside) i know was intern to michael douglas *above mandy and sean had cosmopolitans (mandy) and jack n cokes (sean) with kevin spacey *devin is pen pals with michael alig as he serves his prison term for angel's murder *trev broudy befriended us in the park with his excellent dog riggs *electric six almost came back to our apt for beers but tait got too scared, dick was game *my roommate from my acting class married josh taylor, father to dylan on 90210 and husband on the sandy duncan show *saw val kilmer blow his nose and show it to his female friend in his convertible on fairfax and santa monica stopped in the turning lane.. twice. he saw me the second time and was humiliated *i was the assistant producer of the john and ken show when they were with KFI of the non clear channel variety, emiliano limon was producer and friend *saw red buttons at every free event i got to attend during my stint at kfi as media "professional" (me and emiliano went for the food usually). we even attended a dedication of a mosque for the grub, shameless *was about to have my own radio show with friend christopher at KFI, called shameless, and shamelessly, we fucked that up *regis philbin's daughter lived in the apartment building i managed, heard his unmistakable voice booming through our courtyard one day. funny *michael rapaport was a regular at said building as he had a friend on the 3rd floor; i called him dick ritchie (re: his famous character in TRUE ROMANCE), he didn't get it. he did always say hi though *little stevie from the e street band bought our cd from coco ono (our drag dancer) at the club lingerie show we played for bett williams book "the wrestling party" *bett williams is a dear friend of mine, she gave me and brandon a rockin titty dance in our lap on her bday *candy ass and alexis arquette gave me a ride and other things at a party *alexis always recognizes myself and ex/bff (von) and waves at us; that is the prettiest and most put together drag in weho *the murmurs stared at myself and my ex/bff (von) at gold 9 karaoke across the bar like we were candy *my ex boyfriend is oscar de la hoya's CFO *one of my ex girlfriends was on the colorado silver bullets, the only professional female BASEBALL team there ever was *pamela anderson signed her book she wrote, told me she liked our band name, and looked annoyed next to me in the picture we took *sebastian bach told me i was cute when i waited on him at mel's *my grandpa fought at the battle of the bulge and got a purple heart for frostbite in his feet *my friend liam was james cameron's assistant *i'm friends with accomplished transgender ms jackie enx, radio and tv star and drummer for rhino bucket - she, in fact, is the reason i'm a singer today *i had a great friendship with simpsons artist and director, haven't seen her since she left LA, although devin has... *my best friend since high school is friends with every single person who is anyone in NY: murray hill, the dazzle dancers, john cameron mitchell, marga gomez, penny arcade, enya buttox, michael musto etc. et al *waited on lisa welchel at chili's, bonked her baby on the head with a plate of ribs on accident *friend dudley starred as the first, and best, hedwig in the stage show (ala rocky horror) - i stupidly never saw it *asked fred savage at the "friends helping friends" event i worked if he's ever peed in the shower, he has (this was part of my job for the event, mind you) *danced with "ross and rachel" at a counting crows show at viper room *coco ono's aunt is candice rialson, star of "chatterbox"-b movie queen from the 70's *i'm the lead singer of shitting glitter *my great great grandfather invented the candy corn blessed be this samhain (and it's pronounced sow in, demonika, mandy and ginny know that but maybe the rest of you don't), eat a candy corn and you eat a piece of me

prescribe disclaimer  :  i reserve the right to change my opinion at any opportunity.  i just posted a blog that gave incredibly bad information.  special effects is by far, the best punk dye color.  i stand corrected.  i mean, give me a break, i was young and impressionable.  or just plain stupid and uninformed.  yes yes, oh yay.  on that note, i will now listen to one of my favorite classic british rap songs, fit but you know it by the streets.

bullets
DateCreated	10/25/2005 9:43:00 AM
PostedDate	10/25/2005 9:06:00 AM
Body	*splat is the best punk dye available *play craps if you gamble, best odds and amazing fun *investigate the dog you intend to adopt (please instead of buying), understand it's nature, then buy a collar and identification implant for it *do not declaw cats *pay your employees what they are worth, and thank them for the money they make for you *do not trust cops just because you are white, but definitely don't if you aren't *teach me any yiddish you know, i'm always trying to get my jewish friends to tell me some, but apparently they do not visit their grandmother very often *make me cake any time, any day *keep beverages in your fridge for guests *bring beverages to visit your friends *give away your clothing you don't wear to your friends (thanks meagan) *try wasabi funyuns *do not patronize hamburger mary's west hollywood, horrific service *do patronize basix and cha cha cha, both have great happy hour specials, awesome and unique food *i love the abbey, there i said it *i hate the abbey's music *rich people do get treated MUCH differently, i know, i got to have a hotel room i would never afford on my own. how much does it suck to find that out *someone please get rid of bush *hawaiians are neato *do not shave if you are a woman, it is not necessary *stop the car and get a confused dog out of traffic, you are not in that much of a hurry (but not if the owner is there) *drink patron, but not a HUGE amount *it is not a sin against patron to make margaritas with it, they are actually quite lovely *if you like girls, cut your fingernails *clear surfaces in your living space, it will be the best cleaning technique you will ever employ *matching is overrated, colors are not meant to be the same in clothing, they are meant to compliment *do not tell people you are a vegan, do yoga, don't drink and are allergic to gluten unless it comes up; it's too much in one sitting *if you are allergic to gluten, you can talk to these people about it http://www.gluten.net/ *if you are like me, you can talk to the waitress at el coyote about your habits and nutritional challenges *age becomes irrelevant at a certain point; my friends are anywhere from 18 to 43, and i don't even know which ones are which *hair color, tattoos, pierces. nothing to do with capability in the workplace. are we that stupid? *i still don't believe in prostitution, no matter how trendy it is to support it *i flew to new york this morning in my astral projection. for real b *i'm afraid of wide open spaces *ani di franco changed my mind about guns; i've shot almost every different kind and i never will again. thanks dude *death is not real *i can take you on a death tour of hollywood, just ask me and we can make an arrangement

PRESCRIBE P2 STAINS/AKA PAIN

so one hipster says to another, i think i'll be a massage therapist.  what a fashionable idea.  seems like a great thing.  i can wear my skinny jeans, i can pretend to do something and i can steal money from people that think i look hip.

here's why hipsters don't work:

1.  knit caps.   it's california.  we're not cold.

2.  skinny jeans.  we get it.   you don't eat.

3.  when you do, you pretend to be vegan.  then you eat jack in the crack and forget to throw out the wrapper.

4.  you're tattoos are not original.

5...don't get a tattoo, unless it means something.

6.  i'm not buying it.

7.  your'e judgmental.  cause you do the same things i do.

8.  why can't i tell you apart?

8.  really?

9.  belmont shores is still lbc.

10.  and you're still gonna end up at sweetwater.

11.  bye.

gather ye pink cards
DateCreated	10/13/2005 9:32:00 AM
PostedDate	10/13/2005 9:10:00 AM
Body	so there's this purple soap from the 99c store that smells like the big fat grape lip gloss i used to use when i was a wee lass. it is pretty great, and there are other fruits that i will try next and report back. 99c is about one half successful for me. we do what we call the "try-me" on many items there, and then we either buy it every trip for the rest of our life, or we lost 99c. also, the bath and bodyworks lotion "rice flower and shea" smells like play doh (i recommend the cream, not the lotion). rockin. there is only one hair product for me and it has been discontinued. loreal alt remix paste. i have no idea how supply and demand is expected to work if there is demand and the fucked up corporate america won't supply. i bought the very last case of it right out from under don cornelius's rich ass hands at the loreal store in the beverly center. as luck would have it, there was a fag behind the counter that prolly understood the need of a short haired girl with little money, the fashion crisis occurring before his well shaped eyebrows. he made the call, for family, for hope, for rocknroll. i have about 6 left. the countdown... begins. my grandma pat was katherine hepburn to me. she wore those smart pants outfits, no skirts, she gardened like a madwoman, she made amazing banana pancakes that were mid size with crispy edges, she had blonde hair until the last time i saw her. that time, i didn't recognize her and i shouldn't have, i hadn't seen her in a long time. she was dying. i didn't wake her. she and katherine hepburn are the beginning of drag kings for me. i always ask brandon what my psychological label would be. if anyone out there reads this and knows psychology, and knows me, or has a decent idea by reading this blabla, tell me what would be my diagnosis. brandon is tired of me asking. oh, the subject. let's all pool our pink cards, as of october 16, if you didn't know, you can no longer redeem the pink cards at coffee bean for your freebie. i say let's all go out for coffee and share the 3 we can get when we all throw in. bring a dollar for your tip.

Subject	super tips bullets
DateCreated	2/26/2009 2:31:00 PM
PostedDate	2/26/2009 1:14:00 PM
Body	since i've found some extreme and delicious greatness flowing over the crosby in the past year, i'd like to share some of my super tips in my famous bullet format for your viewing pleasure. these are just a few items i employ to create the atmosphere of supreme living. feel free to pick n choose and apply where you like. + when running, always end in a downhill fashion. this allows you to feel fast, and be fast in fact. you can make the big finish a sprint and feel like a million bucks! + drop the codependent in your life. i know it can be hard to be alone and/or lonely, but you'll find you were much lonelier before you spent time with you and realized your full potential as a separate entity. + spend money. now i know none of us have any, but do yourself a favor, realize money is kinda just a concept. and we'll never really have it, and the only way to keep it a'flowin' is to recirculate it. i'm broke as a joke, and yet i always live luxuriously. + realize what you are really good at, and stay out of the way of those who are good at something you are not. we all have some talent, and it's fantastic to share it with the world. but if you suck at something, move over already and let the people who rock it... rock it. + clean your house. and do it well. everyone appreciates a gorgeous place to recline. if you are super busy, at least find a place to shove things so your guests can appreciate open spaces. it also allows your brain to function much more efficiently. no clutter. + on that note, stock your fridge folks! most everyone has heard this one from me, but if you intend to host anyone, including yourself, at any time, try to have a beverage or two around. not saying you gotta hook up the patron, but a light beer? perhaps? a chip? a nut? a good red wine.. yes. + attempt... now this is important, TRY to remember vegetarians. it's tough, but they will be extremely impressed if you have options for them. + change your hair as much as possible. now i'm not hoping you'll start following my rainbow collection, but i will let you try on my wigs to see what style and color works next on you. + do not look like your significant other. it's kind of gross and seems narcissistic, or incestuous. there's no way you can't maintain some amount of individuality, esp in LA. pick a fun (and different) look walking down the street, and copy it! + don't put too much pressure on yourself. taking things slow and enjoying who you are will give you the most productivity and basic happiness. too much on the plate equals too little accomplished in any realm. + don't talk about shit that people don't understand, esp with a weird uppity tone. know your audience. that way we all have fun talking together. + take advantage of any part of our system that helps you. don't be shy, don't feel bad. cause you need to realize, our system mostly fucks you over. so take it where you can. + don't drive slow, like a big dick. or walk in the middle of.. anything. like an aisle, or sidewalk, then walk wherever you feel. look around you. i call this "geography". or, sometimes.. "geometry". you are not the only person in the world. people will like you much better if you are aware of this. + tell people when they did something great! or if you like what they look like, or something cool they accomplished. i love when people say nice things. i do it as much as possible, but only when i mean it. + on the other hand, don't feel bad if you don't like a certain person or something they did. remember it, cause people need to be responsible for their actions and learn from them. karma baby. and we do define ourselves by the company we keep. you don't want people to think you are that kind of person, if you aren't. + slow down any vice you have for a bit. days, or weeks. or altogether if you want. it is amazing how much control we do have over ourselves, and how it multiplies when you realize it. + buy a journal every so often, you can get them super cheap at target and they have cool designs. even if you don't write, use it for lists or to practice your cursive. whatever, it's just fun to look at them and open them and carry them and read what you wrote later. + light candles around your home. it's wonderful how that type of light, and yummy smells, can make you fell sort of glamourous.. and safe. + bake. try to alternate too. like a cake, then a pie, or if you're really adventurous like devin, crazy good recipes from many sources. then invite people over to eat it, or bring it to their door! + enjoy red wine. good for the heart in so many ways. and treat yourself to good bottles mostly, if not always. not expensive.. good. + if you like drinking, try not to be an asshat drinker. this one is obvious, but i think almost everyone i know, including and especially me, can really use to remind ourselves of this. i try very hard to keep this one in mind now. it usually works, usually. + don't invade people's space. know when it's good and bad to be hanging around. i am very conscientious of trying not to overstay my welcome, even on stage. i also check in with friends if i'm lazing around in their abode as to whether it's time to move it on out. most of you have heard me ask at least once. and i also don't really go anywhere unless there is an invite. just the way i roll. + buy good toilet paper. i love cottonelle. and your ass will too. + get a massage once in a while. it centers your being and opens your energy flow. i recommend my friend dave (aka super dave). let me know if you want his info. he's life changing. + laugh, and also cry. i swear i do both so much, but finally a lot less crying now. but it is still very very necessary. another way to clear your energy flow. do it with a friend too cause it helps when they hug you. + let things go. i cannot tell you how much i used to NOT let things go. now, i simply let it go. this is absolutely not to say that i forget. i just don't store up the fear or the disappointment in my body and muscles. i let it float freely in the universe and not cling to my being. + get out of the house. simply get out of the damn house people! really. everyone knows who the people are that sit at home, and we've almost given up on you folks. there is so much to do in LA, don't waste it! get out of your head or your bad habits, out of your depression or your fear, get out of your drinking, out of your codependence, get out here~ we're here and we are having a blast. + groom. please. clean and short fingernails that type of thing. it feels great to look fresh and pretty. we all love it, so let's do it. +take a good bubbly bath and stare at the tiles. i never used to dig on baths, but now i like relaxing into a hot tub and staring into space. + if you miss someone, find them! tell them, see them. now some of these hints are from my own personal growth, things i do or don't do. some are just things i notice others doing and start to erase them from my book of love. i'm going to finish cleaning.. take a shower after my run...fix my new hair style (blue mohawk) ... giggle a little... get out of the house into the gorgeous day ... go get some red wine ....and then probably bake a big fat cake and bring you some. :)

good girl
DateCreated	10/11/2005 4:11:00 PM
PostedDate	10/11/2005 3:49:00 PM
Body	ok, so you know how you think star 98.7 sucks? well, i am not allowed to say that. it is on at my work all day, and i won a trip to hawaii just because it is. and i dialed the phone a few times. plus $98. so i'm going next week and it is just too funny. and i'm also being pretty good on my diet. i hate diets, but i also hate feeling fucking fat. stupid, i know, but god it feels so much better to have loose jeans. i miss you beer. i haven't even been to a bar in forever, and you all know why. you folks that are on this myspace list. i get really stupid and mouthy. oh well, what is beer for if not to make you a little loose and a little loud. instead, i stayed home to puke up some really good patron the other night. can you tell in the new photo? i look patroned. our album is almost done too and i am really proud of this work. we have been lucky bugs, we got a fantastic guy that believes in us more than we do to mix and master it. and for next to nothing, which is what we had available in the bank account. devin and dylan are going to iceland, me and brandon are going to hawaii, and free alongside ship is awaiting us when we return. i have been playing out in lost angels for over 3 years now, and i can say that you get a sense of music and success and good art. really great shit that makes you remember the performer or the night, or the beat. and there aren't many. i like about 5. you know who you are too, i'm not shy. i'm just lucky, i know i am. i get to work with some of the best artists and think with some of the best brains. lucky bug.

prescribe

PRESCRIBE:  PT1  BLOOD

is it wrong for me to wish that all really active fit people fall into the hole they are climbing?   well, i guess not.   since they usually die of heart attacks first.  so it's not my job.  "god" be with you.  eek i'm morbid today.  yay!  blessed be.

a stirring effusion flutters off my arthur.   i have a very large slice from arthur’s claw on my hand.  he refuses to be pilled.  he’s claustrophobic.  he doesn’t want anyone to make his choice.  i agree with that ideal.  i have a DNR.  and, so does he.  cause he’s my captive.  and my child.  and i believe in assisted suicide.  there’s just a point… you know?

i have the tattoo “bleed” on my wrist.  everyone timidly assumes its suicidal.  why, if so?  why not cry out to the world like most truly suicidal folk?  think about it… they always leave a note.  over and over and over again, before they actually leave that last.  note.  yes.  i’ve thought about it.  but, certainly not while i gained that ink on my my wrist.  it’s just a cool word, meaning a dead obvious idea of what my words do with me.  they bleed from me.  but back to offing oneself…. if i’m gonna do it, wtf kinda jack off idea is that, tattooing it on my wrist?  it will just be plain old blood there.  

but i wouldn’t go that route anyhow.  booooring.  and painful!  i think i’d like to go the soft and easy car in the closed garage sweet dreams and goodnight.  i wonder what the corpse looks like for that choice.  pause.  googling.  ok, whoah.  who knew there was a cutest dead guys website.  well, now we do.  goodness, the government probably has a webcam in my wigs with the sites i look at.

so.

  this

is my blog called prescribe.  ps.  i love nurse jackie.  and i have. no …good.. prescriptions.  unless you count the norco i left sitting at rite aid for months cause they, sadly, make me sick.   what a waste.

ps. i’ve recently had the great pleasure of finally touching two very real dead bodies.  the circumstance must remain a secret, but it was quite thrilling.  now, before you jump to conclusions, i had absolutely no part in their passing.  and certainly, if i would, these two wouldn’t have been my first choices.  

i’m considering becoming a mortician.  perhaps i will go by mortie when the time comes.  i think that’s a dandy name.  

for the love of courtney

the shame. sobriety introduced itself to annie (norwegian popstar) at cinespace in the form of a man-child calling itself "I'M COURTNEY LOVE", whilst i sat in the unenviable position of my own stew of dos equis. at first glance, i looked like a winner. i sat sidesaddle to this new sensation from "beergn" in the green room encouraging her out of an aftershow nerve nest, not having heard a single song. it did "appear" though, that i was her bff. unfortunately, my costume lasted less than a sentence. the ugly face of silly sotty reality reared itself without delay.
i stank, i'm quite sure of this. i reeked of self indulgence, of unawares. of one more forgotten conversation, slurred and half understood colloquy, lugubrious linguistic failures and very likely bad grammar. i was so drunk, i likely misspelled my mumblings. i bandy about the irony, oh the sweltering irony, of an abstaining courtney, front and center.. and a drowing amy. the kind of amy that would appreciate a clear and cordial memory of such a happenstance. whether court ordered or not, that drag queen did it. she managed to abstain. it is do-able. it is done. timing is once more, everything.
i looked myself up in the thesaurus:   bashed, befuddled, boozed up, buzzed, canned, crocked, drinking, drunken, flushed, flying, fuddled, gassed, glazed, groggy, hammered, high, hosed, in orbit, inebriated, jolly, jugged, juiced, laced, liquored up, lit, lush, merry, muddled, oiled, on a bun, overcome, pie-eyed, plastered, plowed, potted, seeing double, sloshed, soaked, sotted, soused, stewed, stoned, tanked, tight, tipsy, totaled, wasted, zonked.
i think it's time to redefine.
so buck up buckglitter, better tucked in and sober than wasted and wasting time, missing and still misses now. :(

the unstretchable truth

dumbstruck, i bore down on the gas. no matter how hard i pushed it, i could not outrun this dread. a country full of hicks and fools, born and raised unbelievably narrowminded and wideassed. shoving hours of potatoes and lies into their unwitting child's piehole. in a perfect world, they would be the first to have a daughter raped and in need of an abortion, or possibly have their son fall in love with joey and wish to be married, but instead tied to a pole and beaten to death. the rules seem undeniably twisted into a knot of white males on a twister mat, one ass blurring into another face. here is my song guaranteed used... this applies more than ever all of a sudden:

i remember ponds with snakes, and a bull that was queer
niggers and fears, inbred to tears
strung up and hung out for bait, i swear i won't clean your slate
so take this useless tripe off my brow
and sell it to some other cow

i always felt a special kin with that bull
he mounted and took all control
he turned those small minds out
now the words had taken their toll

SO IF YOU CARE TO KNOW WHAT YOU BUY
LOOK CLOSELY WITH YOUR BLIND EYE
UNGLUE YOURSELF FROM ALL OF THOSE PEWS
IF IT'S MIDDLE AND AMERICA
IT'S GUARANTEED USED

the moral of this small state
is don't eat everything on your plate
you never know just who will see straight
there's no fucking such thing as fate, tex